hippocarnival | Daybreak Academy

He's not in the greenhouse. [Not watering magic teeth and the absurdity of it makes Yuya's blood run hot, because he knows what happened now and it's not Toki's fault, it's not like they had any better ideas looking before--]

He's not anywhere because my made a wish with the damn fey to not exist! [And he's crying into his arm again. It still hurts, he didn't want to say it.]

[The fey? That person on the network everyone was talking about, that made the kids show up? They can't find him because he doesn't exist. Toki's at a loss for words for once. It doesn't take long before he's crying too, but it's quiet tears instead of his usual sobbing. All of the searching and the worrying was for nothing. Kano did want to leave. And he didn't tell anyone. After a few minutes of silence, he wipes his eyes with his sleeve and turns his chair around to face Yuya.]

If... I-if he wished to not exist, why do we still remember him? Why is Shuuya still here? Kano exists in him, right? So, maybe it's not completely hopeless. Fey things mess up. Maybe it didn't work right and he can still come back.

[Does Kano still exist in Shuuya? Would they really forget him if he just made himself disappear, but leave Shuuya behind? The terms between him and the fey were so vague that Yuya's focused only on the part that's indisputable.]

... I want him to come back.

[He doesn't lift his head becuse he knows he's still crying. Maybe... maybe he should try and talk to this fey. Barter Kano back. Make them stop--whatever this is they're doing, causing all this trouble with little copies of everyone.]

Then let's get him back.

[That's what they had planned to do, only now they know what happened. There's no more searching involved. They know who's responsible. It isn't unreasonable to think a deal could be made, or that discussion was doomed to fail.]

The kids- the other selves, whatever they are, they're not... evil? There's nothing that like shows there's no hope, right!? I mean, no one's been hurt with this thing! Maybe the fey just wanted some amusement and now that it's gone on long enough, they'll give Kano back! And if not, then we fight them! You never know, we could stand a chance because it didn't work on us! We could like, be immune to their power~!

[It's a little far-fetched, but it's what comes to him.]

[Get him back...

Maybe they're immune, but that's not what matters. What matters is if other people got into contact with them, they can too. And even if it was Kano's wish, if it was what Kano asked for...

Yuya can't leave it like that, as if he doesn't have a life that's worth living. If it takes a contract, if he has to give something up then--so be it.

He lifts his head, sniffing as he wipes his eyes before he slides off his bed. He pulls his phone off the charger on his desk.]

They were on the network. I can try to send them a message--[He turns back around to Toki, closer now, and he stops. And stares.]

What happened to your eye?

[They're going to do this. Not cry about Kano any more.]

What are you going to-

[Oh shit. He reflexively brings his hand up to cover his eye at the mention of it.]

That's not important right now!

[Yuya blinks rapidly, then his brow furrows in concern. Toki's normally someone who shares too much. If he's hiding it, that means it's probably really severe. But also, Yuya knows he can't force Toki to talk about it.]

Okay but, if someone's hurting you...

[Please tell him ~~and he'll go fight them immediately~~.]

Edited 2019-04-26 05:25 (UTC)

[Part of him wants to tell Yuya, and part of him doesn't. For the same reason. He's afraid he'll do it again.]

It's not someone, it's- I-

[He drops his hand. Okay, he's doing this.]

Remember in Kano's closet, when I told you something was watching, but I didn't know what it was!? I've been seeing those eyes, that daemon or whatever it is, so many times! I see them when I try to sleep and I still feel it watching for hours after I have a vision about it! It was just- I had a bad day with that and I had a vision about it during the interview with the BBC and Adelaide was there she got them to turn off the camera before I started screaming about it, but they got like part of it, and that doesn't matter, that's not what- I freaked out after, like a lot and I told Adelaide everything because I thought the eyes were the daemon I made a contract with and she said she'd help and we went back here so I could write everything down!

[He stands up from his chair to lift his mattress and grab the notebook Yuya gave him. The other one, Screenplays About My Cat, falls to the floor in his haste. He shoves the vision notebook at Yuya, open to a page filled with slanted, panicked writing and scores of drawings of the same eye over and over.]

I couldn't stop drawing them! I still felt it! And then when we left, it wasn't even five minutes and I had another vision about the same eyes again and it was horrible and I could feel them like penetrating into my soul! And at the end of it, I was looking in a mirror, but my eye wasn't mine! It was the daemon's! It was dripping blood and staring at me and it wasn't mine! It wasn't mine! I had to get it out! I had to! That's all I was thinking about!

[He starts crying half-way through, a panicking choking in between sentences, but he can't stop. He needs to get it all out.]

I tried to take it out! I just- I just clawed at it and I couldn't stop! I couldn't stop! Adelaide was holding me down and I was kicking her and screaming at her to let me do it! I- I wanted it to stop watching me...

[Now that's he's said it, it's not as much of a relief as he thought it would be. There's just more panic over what Yuya will think.]

[Yuya leans back when the notebook is opened, reaching to gently lower it with his hand as Toki starts to give him the panicked explanation.

It's not like he hasn't been worried about Toki's whole mental state, but hurting himself is a new level of alarm.]

Hey. Hey. [Yuya moves to gently grip Toki's arm.] Remember, your visions aren't always that straight forward. Maybe... you should tell someone about them before you act on them. Like another seer. You don't have to try and figure it out alone.

I know! I do know, but it's hard to-

[Rationalize or think clearly or do anything.]

I was going to talk to Professor Jailbreak about them! I told Ekkehardt I would after the whole Valvatorez thing and then this all happened and I haven't yet, but I will! After we deal with Kano! It can wait!

[Ugh. Yuya's shoulders sink, because he's not sure if he wants to put this off.]

Toki, I don't want you to hurt yourself again. [He squeezes with his hand, briefly.] Look--I'll try and find that fey and find a way to bring Kano back. Okay? I will.

That's what Hieke's here for!

[It's a stupid thing to say, but he wants Yuya to think that he'd at least gone to the infirmary after, and not to Rex's van.]

I promise I'll talk to her about the visions! But I want to help with the fey too!

[He won't talk to Jail as promised. Toki's priorities will change when Maverick makes a contract with the Giraffe; and then he'll forget about it altogether.]

If you're going to Mr. Hieke, that means you've already done it! [It's not reassuring at all.]

I'm just sending a message to them right now. [Fine, he'll compromise even if he just wants to tell Toki to go get help.] And if I find out anything more I'll tell you, okay? We won't find anything if we just run around like last time...

[But he can fix it, which is not something to say here. Toki is fine with that compromise, because he was expecting Yuya to just tell him get help.]

Okay! I'll leave it to you~! I should take a shower...

[Wash the blood off, cry some more, that sort of thing. He heads for the bathroom, letting Yuya deal with the fey messaging.]

... Yeah. [Yuya draws his hand back to let him go, glancing down at his phone.]

I'm glad she stopped you. [He mutters, mostly to himself. Yuya knows Toki isn't his responsibility, but he's still relieved that someone was there, and could keep him from doing worse to himself.]

[Toki doesn't show any indication he heard Yuya's mutterings as he closes the bathroom door. He doesn't know how much damage he would have done without Adelaide there either, but if he goes any deeper into this conversation, he may accidentally disclose how Adelaide really stopped him, and that he can't do.]

[By the time he comes back, Yuya's sitting at his desk with his head against it and his phone lying beside him. He got an answer, at least. It wasn't quite the one he wanted, but it was a better answer than he was preparing himself for.]

He'll be back. [He starts dully when he hears Toki leave the bathroom.] In 'maybe' a week.

What!? Just like that!?

[It's hard to believe the fey just gave in to Yuya's demands.]

What did you say to them!?

I asked what they did and to bring him back. They said it wasn't permanent anyway... so I guess the spell is going to wear off.

[And Kano will be back, and Yuya can tell him not to do it again and--he doesn't know what. Maybe ask why.]

[He wants to yell about it, but he's too tired.]

Kano just had to tell somebody, and no one would have worried.

[Weeks of wondering what happened and why and thinking the worst, and now that there's answers, Toki feels no satisfaction from this outcome. There's something starting deep inside, a realization that Kano maybe cares about no one but himself.]

[Yuya would still worry, for the same reason he's worried now. That Kano would ask to erase his existence. That he'd call it better. Were those things his mom told him?]

Do you think he'd have done it if we said not to?

I don't know! Maybe!?

[He can't really say one way or the other. Not without knowing what Kano felt when he asked.]

If it's... really what he wanted, we couldn't have stopped him. He'd find another way.

No, but... maybe it wouldn't be what he wanted if he know how much he mattered.

[Yuya knows that Kano has people precious to him. He can't believe that wouldn't mean anything unless he thought it wasn't the same in return.]

[Toki can't agree there, not completely.]

Sometimes even that isn't enough.

[Yuya gritd his teeth.] Well we wouldn't know if we don't say it!

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